I don’t know why we insist on new commencement speeches every year. The Kids in the Hall nailed it back in 1990.
Hmm, minimum wage. Do I want to work for as little money as legally possible? Let me carefully consider your offer… Oh, I’ve got the answer here in the pocket of my $350 suit jacket…
I’m pretty sure I’m allowed to just die now
I’m not sure how I could possibly top this
This was a goddamn Gleemonex moment. If I was locked into a happy coma I’m pretty sure it’d look just like this.
I also did a print of that Manny Coon picture I did and gave it to him! Scott recognized who it was immediately and seemed happy! At least he put it into his little satchel instead of casually tucking it into a flower vase as soon as I turned around or something.
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST




